Their Secret
by Lydinya
Summary: Kanan and Mari just wanted to be young girls in love, not this. It's too bad life doesn't always turn out the way they want. Instead they must keep a secret, their secret.
1. The Beginning

Kanan stared down the chamber of the gun as she felt her sweat gliding down her temple with each passing second. She was far too frightened to look away from the metal death chamber that was aimed between her eyes. All that was running through her head were her final words and maybe even some regrets. While near death, she began to notice all the little things in life that didn't matter at the time, but now would make her the happiest girl on Earth.

_You might actually have been happy, if you just weren't such a coward._

Kanan's thoughts were drowned out as her heart beat grew louder. That was, until her concentration was finally broken. She heard a sweet, yet broken, voice call out to her ears from behind the revolver,

"I'm so sorry I got you into this."

It was Mari. The girl of her dreams. The person she promised she'd do anything for. Now here she was, tears running past her butterscotch eyes, as she softly hiccupped with each sob.

Kanan was going to put her self-made vow to the test.

She doesn't know how they got into this situation, but what she does know is that Mari doesn't look like she can handle another second in this situation. Her hands shook to keep the gun within her grasp while her body trembled with fear. Kanan refused to let this end badly for the blonde beauty before her. She attempted to get up from the ground she was on, as the ropes that bound her arms to her body added to the struggle. A sharp voice suddenly cut through the air,

"Stop! Get up and I'll end you both."

Behind Mari was a tall man with blinding platinum hair slicked back and sharp pair of blue eyes to go with him. He stared viciously at the young girls before him, as neither of them had bothered to look where the noise had come from, their only focus was on each other. Kanan softly gazed towards Mari as the golden-haired girl attempted to keep up her slowly crumbling composure. With their eyes locked Kanan gently whispered,

"Just do it, Mari. Please. I can't see you get hurt, not for me."

By now, Mari couldn't stop her tears from forming, despite them blinding her vision. She knew Kanan meant every word, but that doesn't mean she won't at least try to keep her alive longer, just to hear that raspy voice for a few seconds more.

"I know you still have one more trick up your sleeve, Kanan. Now would be a great time to use it, please."

Mari held Kanan's gentle gaze even fiercer than before, as if asking her to do something, anything, just for her. All their life it was always Mari getting them in trouble, whether it be with their parents or with the local law enforcement, while Kanan continuously got them out. However, for once it seemed Kanan no longer saw an escape.

"I'm sorry, Mari", Kanan finally broke their gaze as she dejectedly looked down at the dirt she sat upon. Not wanting Mari's last moments with her to be sad however, she faked a smile before finishing,

"It seems we've run out of luck this time."

Mari stared at Kanan, truly taking her angelic appearance in. She wanted to remember each and every detail about the young diver. Wishing their moment could last just a few seconds longer, their time was cut short as the man behind her yelled out,

"What the hell did I say? Just shoot her already!"

The blonde-haired girl raised the gun to Kanan one more time with shaky hands as violet eyes gently observed at her every action. The sheer silence surrounding the two girls was just quiet enough to hear each of the girl's hearts break. Mari put her finger on the trigger, slowly choking back a sob while Kanan softly let her tears fall. No matter what, Kanan always tried her hardest to put on a brave face, just for her. With that in mind, it was no surprise to anyone when golden eyes were shut from view before a screech came crying out,

"I can't do it!"

Throwing her gun to the floor, Mari shattered the chamber into multiple pieces. Gasps could be heard from all around the girls as people stared at each other with worried faces before a furious voice broke the tension,

"CUT!"

The directors voice boomed through the studio as everyone hid their heads, they could tell he was pissed.

"Mari this is the 7th take! Just shoot Kanan and say your damn lines!"

Mari looked at him with red eyes and an exhausted face as she screamed back towards him,

"I want to see you come down here and try this! It's a lot harder to do this when you have to murder your best friend,"

Before finishing her sentence though, Mari spun on her heels, almost as a princess would, as she smiled at her blue-haired beauty before whispering just loud enough for all to hear,

"Whom I love so very much."

The whispers around the studio turned to snickers as they saw Kanan blushing all the way down her neck from the previous statement. Everyone knew there was chemistry between the two actresses, since they were both childhood friends, but they never got to see their sparks up close. From the way they interacted it left many to assume the two had a past fling or something along that nature, but to Kanan's many refusals it left everyone just secretly shipping them. However, the situation of a pissed off director was still there and before it could escalade any further Kanan decided to put a stop to it, also because her face was burning from the stares focused at them. The cobalt-haired girl got up from her seated position while taking her arm out from the stretchy ropes used to bind her. She wrapped an arm around Mari's shoulder to calm her down as she turned towards the director,

"How about we call it a day? We've been shooting for about 10 hours straight anyways and I think I speak for everyone when I say we need a break."

The director only looked at them with frustration leaking from his pores. Despite being upset with one of the actresses he also knew that Kanan's words were correct, he was running his crew dry. He let out a large exaggerated sigh while rubbing his temples as he begrudgingly yelled out,

"Fine! Everyone, go home. Let's pick this up again tomorrow!"

While equipment started to begin moving all around the two girls, Kanan grabbed Mari's hand, already having a place in mind to take her to cool off. She began to make her way towards her trailer and judging from the tugs she felt, Mari was still very upset. Even from within her soft hands, Kanan could feel her tense posture. Her violet eyes searched for her trailer while her mind unconsciously began to rub soft circles on the back of Mari's hand. After reaching the small 1-bedroom trailer the girls let themselves in and were immediately greeted by the cool wind that had been hoarded in the room the entire day. Being able to finally relax, Mari belly flopped onto the couch before shouting out through a muffled cry,

"Ugh Dave always pisses me off! Why can't he see that my character would totally not be able to kill her friend! Especially with our chemistry on that set, they might as well be lovers! You can't kill off a love interest! That makes a bad movie!"

Kanan gently smiled at her as she continued her rant before grabbing two water bottles for each of them from her mini fridge. Hearing Mari's words fade more and more she realized she was finally allowed to talk,

"Well I'm sure the feeling between you two is mutual. But besides that, you already know directors always have different visions for their characters. We're just getting paid to bring them to life, not change them."

Mari looked as if she was stabbed in the back from the blue-haired girl's statement. She turned her body over to side eye Kanan. Her violet eyes showed sincerity in her words while Mari's showed annoyance. She rolled her body back over before she spit out,

"You're supposed to be on my side Kanan. Not his."

Kanan let out a light chuckle as she got up from crouching at the fridge. She strolled over and sat by Mari's feet before handing over the water bottle to the young girl,

"I'll tell you what Mari. Get through this scene tomorrow with no fights or mess ups and I'll take you to the best restaurant in town as a reward."

Mari looked over at Kanan with suspicion in her eyes. She knew the cobalt-haired girl didn't like to be seen in public very often. Especially not with her, since rumors of the two being romantically linked were in full swing thanks to this movie starring them both as leads with no male casting to be seen. Before Mari could overthink the situation, Kanan looked down at her water bottle avoiding eye contact, just as she did when they were younger and she was much more reserved, as she whispered aloud,

"You and me. Just like old times."

Hearing those magic words brought a smile to Mari's face. She wasn't sure if their definition of 'old times' was still the same, but she couldn't help but hope. She sat up quickly and turned her full body in order to wrap her arms around Kanan's torso. While rubbing her face into Kanan's chest she muffled out,

"Oh Kanan, you know you don't have to act so shy when asking me on a date! I would never say no!"

Kanan's face burned a deep red as she attempted to push back Mari's head before exclaiming out,

"It's not a date! It's a celebration for you finally being able to finish a scene!"

Mari continued laughing as she let herself be pushed away. Her giggles slowly faded away as she watched Kanan's embarrassment grow more obvious with her cheeks. Her bright red face was turned away from Mari, but she couldn't have that. With her soft hands, Mari gently cupped Kanan's face to look into her violet eyes. Soon enough the mood turned serious as the room fell silent. All that could be heard was the slow agonizing droplets of the fossette running in the kitchen. Neither one of them were ready to break the silence that held together their precious moment. Their eyes wandered each other's faces and just like old times, their lips met once again for their usual midnight dance. A secret was all that they were and both girls knew that, but they loved to live in their fantasy world where they had never become famous. Where they had just stayed normal countryside girls, who fell in love. Unfortunately, reality always hit and when it struck, it aimed just for a certain blue-haired diver. Kanan's eyes burst open as she pushed Mari away. She knew what they were doing was wrong. Or at least, that is what she told herself when she was met with a pair of heartbroken golden eyes each and every time. Mari was used to this though. She knew all too well how fast Kanan would push her away physically and emotionally, but that never stopped her from believing she would someday change, just for her. She looked back at Kanan with a smile on her lips as she took in her blushing cheeks and dilated eyes. It was about time she took her leave, but not without speaking out the same dialogue she told her love each night since they were young,

"You know I love you Kanan. I'm just waiting for you to realize you love me back."

Hearing those words leave Mari's mouth, Kanan turned her face in discomfort. It always got to this point. They would go too far and Kanan would spend weeks holed up, avoiding her until they were almost strangers. It hurt each time, but Mari would always come back. No other person out there could make her heart skip a beat with a simple smile upon their lips. She was lovestruck by her best friend and she just knew the feeling was mutual. As Mari began her stroll towards the door, she stopped at the frame. Looking down at her fingers running along the doorknob, she paused. She knew she wouldn't be seeing any of this again anytime soon. For a moment she gathered her last bit of strength she had with her that night before gently whispering,

"And I'll wait forever for you if I have to."

She turned the sleek knob to open the door. The cool night air brought her fresh goosebumps as she walked out of the door, gently closing it. She slowly trailed back to her own trailer in hopes that maybe today would be the day Kanan finally chased after her. It's too bad that no matter how hard she wished, this little dream simply wouldn't come true.

Kanan let out a large breath she didn't realize she was holding as she slumped back into the seat. Her body already knew her routine for when these things would happen. Find the nearest alcoholic drink and drown away these thoughts. She got up from the couch she was resting on only to go back to the mini fridge. If she was going to get hammered, then there was no point in needing any more water. She instead reached past the water bottles for her 'celebration' wine she was going to give Mari when the movie was finished filming. She had even imported it from Italy for her. Kanan knew it was such an old woman way to get drunk, but she would do anything to get her mind away from those heartbroken eyes. She popped open the top, drinking straight from the bottle with one hand while loosening her button up shirt with the other. Kanan took a breath as she looked up towards the ceiling. She placed her hand where her heart was rapidly beating. She couldn't tell if it was from the drink, her long day, or just _her._ Before her thoughts could get too far though, she clamped her eyes shut as she chugged as much as she could, letting the alcohol burn her throat with each new gulp. It was any wonder how Mari could love her voice, she had put it through hell and back because of the young girl. Finally letting the intoxicating liquid hit her, she let her tears fall for a second time that day before whispering to herself,

"I do love you, Mari. And that's my problem."


	2. The Middle

Sometimes Mari would come early to set, as she was an early riser.

Or so she told herself.

With no reason to really be there, she would usually take the time to read over some of her lines, as she usually procrastinated on learning them. But hey, she was a miracle worker. As she stared at her script, she could hear Kanan's raspy voice speaking with the others on set. It was the scene in which her character would be at-cross with Kanan's, yet the blue-haired girl was out chatting with everyone else, having the time of her life, rather than taking her seat right next to her and reviewing the scene as they usually did. She couldn't blame her though. They filmed the movie out of order, due to scheduling issues, but after what had happened between them earlier in filming, Mari was deeply wishing she could film that ending scene. Then again, she probably still couldn't pull the trigger.

As the director called for the scene to be set, Kanan finally went over to her seat to touch up on makeup and go over lines.

"How was your weekend?"

Mari read her script again over and over as she tried to ignore any kind of conversation Kanan was attempting to start. She knew the signs and usually Mari was one to fall for it, just to talk to her again, but today just wasn't her day. Sure she was here early but everything was going wrong already. She had walked in while they were filming, got yelled at, spilled her coffee, and even got hit on by the random mic guy. Nothing was going right today.

"It was fine."

Mari deadly replied as she just stared at her script, not even reading the words. She couldn't focus with Kanan so near.

"Oh that's good. My weekend was boring. You know we should actually-"

Mari could already tell where the conversation was going. Kanan was going to invite her to hangout, things would happen, and then they would go back to not speaking.

"Kanan, I know what you're going to suggest and I'm going to stop you there. If you want a one night stand, just hook up with one of the lighting girls. I'm not in the mood."

Mari got up to leave but before she could go, Kanan grabbed her hand.

"Wait! That wasn't-"

"Mari and Kanan, you're needed on set."

Mari looked up as the intern called them. Without a glance back, the young blonde took her hand back and began her way to set. With her hand still out, Kanan let out a deep sigh. She closed her hand and got up from her chair.

As she followed the blonde girl, she couldn't help but feel bad. She always loved being near Mari, that was until things got complicated and they turned into whatever they were now.

Mari was already on set as she watched the tall blue-haired girl approach her. Having to switch personalities and pretend everything was okay was kind of Mari's specialty. Perking up, Mari pulled on a smug face as Kanan came closer. And as if they were already adjusted to these things, Kanan pretended like nothing was wrong, even sticking her tongue out playfully as well, as they acted like their normal selves in front of the cameras.

"Ready on set!"

Of course, it would be Mari to mess up the scene for the fifth time today. It was the simplest lines too, yet she just couldn't get them out of her mouth. They hadn't even made it to the argument but Mari could feel herself ready to explode. The pure frustration and anger of everything was bottling up and even though she would be acting, yelling at someone would help in the slightest.

"Mari, you're needed on set."

Mari whipped her head towards the voice as she was busy thinking to herself. While she got up to walk towards the set, Mari looked down at her feet while whispering her lines under her breath as to make sure she didn't stutter on her words, like she has been all day.

The review within her head went well, that was until she was faced with her real issue, the tall blue-haired girl in front of her. With a smile on her face, Kanan greeted her as usual.

"Mari, shall we?"

Kanan jokingly said as she put her hand out in a courting like gesture. Mari rolled her eyes as she walked to her position. She was just here to do her job then go home and pretend like certain girls with blue hair, purple eyes, and unreasonably toned abs didn't exist.

"Let's get this show going ladies! Mari, don't screw this up this time."

The director called out to both of them as he prepared behind the camera.

Hearing those words never bothered Mari but hearing Kanan giggle under her breath rather than defend her just pissed her off more than usual. Balling her hands into fists, Mari was very well prepared for this scene.

"Action!"

"Maybe if you didn't always go running head first into things, Aina, we wouldn't be in this problem in the first place!"

Kanan begun the scene yelling towards Mari. Hearing Kanan yell with no mercy took the blonde back, it was as if a switch had went off in her. One second she was laughing the next she was furious.

"Well I'm sooo sorry, Suwawa. But unlike you, I actually follow my heart!"

Mari yelled out, equally upset. Kanan didn't let her act down as she continued on her script,

"Oh don't say that 'follow your heart' bullshit to me. Can't you just think for once? Think of everything that could go wrong. Think of everyone this could damage! Then again, making stupid decisions is just like you, isn't it?"

Mari felt as if Kanan was speaking directly towards her, they weren't in character anymore to her.

"Oh fuck you! It's not my fault everything is going to shit between us. You're the one who can't ever say how you're feeling so I had to step up! Oh, but now that I have it's like you want to forget about everything!"

Everyone around them watched the two girls fight, realizing that the dialogue was not in the script, yet no one wanted to be the one to get in between the two girls' argument.

Kanan stepped back, glancing at the director waiting for the cue to cut yet all he did was sit there with his hands in his head,

"Uhh, I don't think that's the li-"

"What about everything between us? You expect me to just forgive and forget? When will the cycle end? I'm tired of dancing this same dance."

Kanan awkwardly stood there as she was yelled at. She didn't want to listen to Mari's words. She knew they were true, but that didn't mean everyone else had to hear it.

"Okay, that's enough Mari"

"No!"

Mari cut Kanan off, stepping in her space as she continued,

"Now you're actually listening for once? What's wrong? No doors are around for you to walk out of?"

With Mari's final words, Kanan was set off.

"Just shut up, Mari! I can't do it, okay? What do you want from me?! I'm not like you, I can't just do whatever I want. There are consequences to everything! Not everything should be taken a chance on or we'd all end up like you! All alone, crying over someone who doesn't want to be with you!"

Kanan was breathless as she yelled out her final words. Only after they were spoken, she felt the weight of everything around her. In her blinded rage she forgot about everything around her but now that she came to, it wasn't a sight she wanted to see.

Mari stood in front of her, tears rolling down her face in both anger and sorrow. All around her, the cast members stared at them, waiting to see the next move.

Kanan's face grew red in embarrassment, she said a silent prayer for the world to just swallow her in this moment.

"Well then, I guess we're done here."

Mari attempted to say as her voice cracked with insecurity.

Kanan wanted to reach out and I tell her it was a lie, but even if she did there was no way to prove it was.

With Mari walking off set, the director just sat there in his same position. Another good scene wasted.

"Kanan, get over here."

Kanan slowly lifted her head towards the director, ready to face the brunt of her actions. Walking towards the older man, the blue-haired girl watched Mari from the corner of her eyes walk off set.

With Kanan standing in front of the director, he let out a deep sigh, rubbing his temples before he began,

"Look I don't know what's going on between you two, but you need to fix it. This movie is almost done and if we can't get through these scenes, it just won't work. I'm sure we can work with the fight scene now, we'll just... cut certain parts."

Kanan couldn't look at the director as he told her everything. She already knew what she had to do, being scolded didn't exactly help her.

"Look, you know what the final scene is, Kanan. If you guys can't pull it together for your 'happy ending', it's not going to look good for either of your futures in this business. No one wants to work with a couple of kids who can't get their shit together."

Ouch. That hurt Kanan more than she would have liked. Mari could survive not ever being in a movie again, her family has her covered. However, it was different with Kanan. This was her only escape, this was her make or break. All of her other roles were barely enough to support herself and her family's business. Losing this paycheck would mean losing her entire family's life support and possibly future roles.

"Okay, I'll fix this. We'll do the final scene tomorrow and then we'll be out of your hair. No need to slander names."

Kanan told the director with her head down. She didn't know how she was going to do it but she had to pull both of them together for this.

"Alright, Kanan. I'll trust you but let me down and I'll make sure your life is hell like you've made my last couple months spending it with both of you."

The director called towards everyone else to pack up for the day and as the busyness of everyone moving around surrounded Kanan, she could feel the weight of everything. She had to get this together for one day. That's it.

Maybe someone could help.

"Please, Dia, you have to help me!"

"Kanan, I really can't believe you called me in the middle of an important meeting for this."

Kanan pouted through the phone as she had attempted to get in contact with Dia for the past hour. With numerous voicemails and a final message of emergency, her prayers were finally answered to a rather upset Dia.

"But Dia, you always know what to say and you've helped me so many times before, I just need this one favor!"

"Kanan, you've asked for multiple 'favors' in this lifetime I really think at this point you might as well call them requests."

Dia retorted back to Kanan as she knew this exact conversation like the back of her hand.

"Okay fine, whatever, Dia but please, I need your help. I've fucked up really bad this time. Like really really bad."

Dia sighed as she heard Kanan's voice begin to crack. Crying was usually the last thing the blue-haired girl did before she gave in, it had to be serious.

"Okay tell me what happened."

"Yeah, you fucked up Kanan."

"Wow, thanks Dia."

Dia sighed as she sat down in her office. She had been friends with Kanan and Mari since they were all kids and she got to see their friendship bloom into a relationship before her eyes. She had helped both of them to accept their feelings for one another and through every bump in their relationship. That was until they all seperated and their relationship could barely even be called that.

"Look Kanan, I can't help you. You have to grow up for once. Everytime you and Mari fight, you always called me and I would coach you on what to say. If anything, Mari was forgiving me this entire time, never you. You need to own up to your actions. Think about what you say and how you feel. You just have to get yourselves together for a final scene. I'm sure Mari is mature enough to hold it together for one day but think past that as well. Do you really not want to be with her anymore?"

Kanan looked at the wall in front of her. She had been in her trailer for the past hour since the scene ending and yet she hadn't really thought about anything past this moment. Without a second thought, Kanan let her heart speak,

"I said I couldn't be with her, not that I didn't want to."

"Then what are you so afraid of, Kanan?"

"I think you know, Dia."

There was silence on the line. Dia knew the reason and getting Kanan to say it would be like pulling teeth. Out of all of them, Kanan was the only one who didn't have the best financial background yet she was far too proud to admit it.

"Then do what you must, Kanan. If you don't want to risk it, go talk to her like an adult and get this over with but don't go back to her ever again."

Kanan was shocked for a moment, was Dia asking her to not be friends anymore?

"I-I'm sorry, Dia. What are you asking me to do?"

Dia closed her eyes and as her heart hurt her chest, she knew she had to say the words.

"Kanan, if you don't want to be with Mari anymore then stop bothering her. I know that after you guys fight, Mari is left heart broken then you come along a couple weeks later as if nothing happened. You always come back into her life and she doesn't ever push you out, when she has every right to. You know how she feels, we all do, yet no one really knows what's going through your head. One minute you two are like kids again, then the next I'm getting a phone call on how you messed it up. If you really don't want to spend your life with her, then let her go. Let her live her life as she is destined to and stop holding her back, Kanan."

Kanan sat in silence as she knew every word Dia spoke was true. She had been the one to always come back into Mari's life. She was selfish, something about the blonde beauty drew her in everytime. She was like a breath of fresh air. Kanan knew she hadn't felt this way about anyone in her life. Yet, here she was, always being the one to wipe the smile from her face.

"You know, Dia, I love her. I don't think I can live without her."

"I know, Kanan. But don't think about yourself, think about her. How long have you kept her waiting for you to finally grow up. Don't you think if she's ready and you're not, it's just not meant to be?"

Kanan could feel her tears building. She didn't want to have this conversation, she just wanted to go back to the way things were. When they were all kids running around their small town. Back when they would all hang out for as long as they could before they all parted ways to try and sneak home without getting caught. Back when her and Mari's secret moments were nothing but a small peck on the cheek while running between classes. Before the harsh economy of Numazu hit her diving store. Before their trio turned into a dysfunctional duo. Before, everything really.

"Do you think the saying is true, Dia?"

Kanan asked between sniffles.

"Which saying?"

"If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it's yours. If not, it was never meant to be."

"I think so, Kanan. I really do. Just try it out, at the least. Maybe this is what you've been needing?"

As Dia spoke, a person came rushing into her office. Before they could speak however, Dia's emerald eyes cut through them silencing them before they could even speak. As they were silent, they tried motioning someone wanted to speak with her. Letting out a sigh, Dia signaled them to leave.

"Look Kanan, I have to go. You know I'll always be here for you, okay? Whatever choice you make I'll stand by you, but for once, I ask of you not to be selfish. Think about how many of these phone calls I've had with Mari as well. Goodbye."

Kanan stayed on the line until the dial tone deafened around her. Had she really not been thinking about Mari?

Before she had even begun to put away the phone, a knock was at her trailer door.

Walking over to open it, Kanan was ready to be yelled at by the director again for not going and making up sooner. As she opened the door Kanan already prepared herself,

"I know I know, Just give me a sec-"

Kanan's words became stuck in her mouth as she realized it was Mari before her. She wasn't angry with her as she was on set but rather solace. She looked towards the ground, fidgeting as if she were in a tiny space.

"Oh, h-hey, Mari."

Kanan awkwardly stood there as this was not what she had expected. She prepared to have at least 2 slaps before she even got out her first words.

"I'm here to apologize, Kanan."

The blue-haired girl looked at Mari in shock. Those weren't exactly the first words she expected either.

"Uh, Mari, I think I should be the one-"

Mari swiftly interrupted Kanan before she got out her words, quickly raising a hand,

"No, it's my fault. I shouldn't have yelled at you on set-"

"We were doing a fight scene, Mari."

Kanan interrupted with a laugh. Mari smiled sadly at her before continuing.

"Yeah we were but whatever we have going on, i shouldn't have pushed it. I know how you are and I just wanted more. It was just really bad timing especially since yo- I mean-we tend to run away from one another and it's not so easy to escape when we have to come back to each other on set everyday."

Mari laughed out the ending in hopes that Kanan didn't catch her slip up but it didn't stop the young diver's heart to clench deeply in her chest. She knew it was the truth but it still hurt.

"Look, either way. I know we have one last scene and I promise I won't bring this up anymore. Let's just get through our final scene and then this whole mess will be over for good, yeah?"

Kanan had listened to each of Mari's words, she too just wanted this entire movie over with. It was getting to be too much and she just needed to leave.

Like she always did.

"Okay, Mari. It's one last scene, I'm sure we can do it!"

Mari sighed a breath of relief. Her previously nervous face turned joyful as she smiled towards Kanan,

"Ah, great! I thought this was going to be a lot worse, honestly. Well, I'll see you tomorrow, Kanan!"

Kanan smiled back at Mari as she left. She slowly waved at her and while she was going to see her tomorrow, it felt as if there was a hidden meaning to her words.

Kanan sat in her chair on set, sipping away at her coffee attempting to keep awake. She had spent a majority of the night thinking about everything. She came to her conclusion, it was time to give them both space. It wasn't healthy what they were doing. It took a toll on them mentally and their problems just broke apart their friendship even greater, including with Dia and it just wasn't fair to her that they couldn't act like adults. With all of this in mind, Kanan readied herself.

No more going back to Mari.

No more.

With determination on her face, she set her coffee down and already began walking towards set. No one had to call her, Kanan liked being early anyways. She felt as if she always needed to be doing her best, as if someone were watching her.

"I'm sorry, what!?"

"You heard me, Kanan. The final scene was the dying kiss one. I thought you already knew that?"

Kanan had been busy having a discussion with the director for over 10 minutes now as she didn't realize what they would be doing today. She had seen all of the crew setting up the scene but it didn't look like the ending she had remembered in her script. Which brought her to now, questioned the director and trying her best not to scream.

She just got done saying they were going to forget about this whole, whatever they have going on, and now they're going to get a tiny reminder?

"B-But i thought my character dying was cut from the script?"

"It was, but the author of the book said it wouldn't have as big of an impact if she didn't die. Sorry but she's the one funding this so what she says, goes."

Kanan stood there defeated as the director went back to his chair before calling out,

"Alright, actors on set! Someone go get Mari!"

Walking back to her scene, Kanan wondered if Mari knew what was happening too. Better yet, had she read and memorized the second script like Kanan had. If not, this was going to be a long day.

"I-I'm sorry, Aina. I don't think I can go anymore."

Kanan let out in an exhausted tone. She knew her character was slowly dying from a gunshot wound but she couldn't help but think of how ironic it was in the film. Mari was able to quickly move and pull the trigger on the villian but at his last breath, he went to shoot Mari but not before Kanan jumped in the way, dying just like he wanted.

"Don't tell me that, Suwawa. Just hang on a little bit longer, help is on the way."

Mari let out, in tears. She held onto Kanan in her lap with such intensity it was almost as if her lover really was dying.

Letting out a cough, Kanan milked her dying scene even more.

She hoped The Academy was gonna see this.

"You know I've got to go but don't look so sad, Aina. I don't like it when you cry."

Kanan lifted her weak hand to wipe Mari's tears. The girls couldn't help but softly smile at one another, basking in their intimate moment.

"Why? Why did you save me?"

Kanan moved her hand softly against Mari's face as she whispered out to her,

"I think you know why."

Not a set of eyes were dry in the room as they watched Kanan slowly die in Mari's arms.

"I know, I just want to hear you say it."

"I love you."

With the final line, the director made the cue to go for the kiss but Kanan and Mari just stared at one another. Each girl told themselves that it was just apart of the act. Just a simple line. Yet here they were, taking in this moment not wanting it to be let go.

Mari took the lead, as usual, as she slowly went in for the final movie kiss. They had plenty of practice with one another before, yet nerves racked both of the girls bodies.

As their lips met, it was as if there were no other sweeter victories in the world. Both girls basked in the moment, no one was around them. Just two simple girls with one feeling.

No secrets. No mistakes. No Pain. Just a feeling.

Mari gripped onto Kanan tighter, not wanting this to end. She tried taking in the moment as long as she could before it would be taken away from her. God knows she would miss moments like these.

Kanan however wasn't thinking about the moment. She was thinking about everything before. Their kiss was soft and gentle. It reminded her too much of when they were young. All their discrete hand holding, their secret glances, the rush of just getting to see one another, but most importantly: the love they used to have. What happened to it all?

As they finally separated, both girls opened their eyes. Kanan finally saw Mari's soft eyes with tears of pain running down her face.

"Oh"

'I'm what happened.'

—

Getting off set and back to her trailer had been a blur. Kanan couldn't remember anything, it was all white noise to her. She couldn't snap out of her daze.

How had she let them slip so far out of reach that they couldn't even be themselves anymore?

She couldn't remember the last time she made Mari smile. Back when they were young, it was all she could do, but now, it was so foreign to see her happy.

With her back hitting the bed, the young diver stared at the ceiling, contemplating everything she had prepared before this moment.

The plan was simple: do the final scene, pretend like nothing happened, things will go back to normal in a couple months, then this time NOT go back with Mari.

Now the plan was beginning to look less and less solid.

Dia had told her though, let it go. Things will work out… but what if they didn't?

Kanan shot up from her bed. She hadn't thought about what if Mari never came back to her.

'What if she found someone new? What if she moves on and I stay here waiting for her instead?'

Kanan looked at her hands. This all didn't feel right to her. It was supposed to be her and Mari until the end. They were each other's person.

Quickly grabbing her jacket, long forgetting her plan out the door, Kanan sprinted out to Mari's trailer.

She couldn't let this happen. She'll just ask for more time. With an explanation of things, Mari would surely understand, right?

Running across the lot was no problem for Kanan. She briefly caught eyes with the director and it looked as if he wanted to say something, but she didn't have the time to stop when she was so close to losing Mari.

Not even knocking, Kanan quickly skipped the steps of Mari's trailer. Reaching her hand out to turn the knob without stopping, the blue-haired girl went full force into the door only to be stopped by a lock.

So much for a dramatic entrance.

Falling off the platform it stood on, Kanan looked at the trailer confused as it swayed back and forth slowly from the force of her body.

"Locked door? That's a first."

Despite Mari always being raised in a strict home, she actually rarely locked her doors. Kanan couldn't count the amount of times someone had walked in on them. There were even more times she was sprinting away from hotel security. But now wasn't the time for a walk down memory lane.

Walking over to the door, the young girl slowly knocked on the door,

"Mari, are you there?"

Hearing only the ringing in her ears, Kanan attempted to knock on the door again.

"C-Can I talk to you? I think, no, I know I messed up. I don't really know what to do right now, Mari."

More silence filled the air.

"I don't want to be like those cliché moments in movies where I say how I feel and then i unload the big "L" word on you and you suddenly come out and blah blah blah we live happily ever after because I really don't even think that could fix everything I did but, I just really want to talk."

Taking a seat by the door, Kanan let out a sigh,

"I screwed this up pretty hard, didn't I? You don't even want to look at me."

Fiddling with her hands to fill the awkward silence, Kanan kept talking as she didn't exactly know what else to do.

"You know, I'm going to wait by your door until you answer, right? It's okay, I have time and I know you usually have night flights so you can sleep on the plane so your flight is gonna leave in probably a couple hours so unless you wanna be la-"

"Matsuura, what are you doing talking to yourself like a crazy person?"

The director interrupted Kanan's rambles. Realizing how embarrassing that was, Kanan quickly sat up to face the man,

"Director! W-What are you doing here?"

"I would ask you the same thing. Don't you know, Mari left for her flight like an hour ago."

Kanan's heart stopped.

"An… hour ago?"

"Yes, but that's not what I'm here to tell you."

Kanan quickly began to sprint towards her trailer as the director continued talking. She knew if she left now and bought a ticket at the flight they'd let her in but getting Mari to stay would be a bit more difficult. However, she would regret it if she never tried.

Getting to her room, Kanan didn't exactly have a plan but she had to try something. Which is why she was turning her room upside down in an attempt to look for her credit card.

A couple months on cup ramen soup would surely make up for this big chunk in her wallet and while she'd rather it not be this way, she had to take a chance. While she was getting high in celebrity status, there's no doubt the security wouldn't just let her pass without paying.

Finally grabbing ahold of the card, Kanan showed it in the air as if it were a prize. Spinning on her heels to get out even faster, the director slid in front of her door, hands out, attempting to catch his breath,

"Kanan! First of all, wow you have great stamina."

Kanan attempted to slip by him,

"Thanks, I used to work at a diving shop growing up so I worked out a lot, maybe sometimes i'll show you it, okay bye!"

The director grabbed her arm though,

"Kanan you don't even know what airport she went to."

"Yeah I do! She always takes-"

"Besides, you can't leave yet."

Kanan looked at the director in confusion.

"What do you mean? Everything is over. Movie is wrapped up."

"Kanan, do you not remember? When you and Mari had your big 'incident' on set we had to call it a day. I emailed you saying we needed some re-shoots. Did you not check it out?"

Kanan's heart sank. She remembered those emails but this couldn't be more of a worst time.

"B-But it's just for today, we can call it back for one more day."

"Kanan, you have been saying that everytime Mari had a bad day or wasn't feeling up to it. Those days were made up for Mari but they ran into your schedule and now we have to make up for it. Time is money and right now, Kanan. We're running out of both."

"Sir, please, it won't hurt just to-"

"No, I'm tired of the excuses. We're finishing your scenes this week and then you can go off and chase Mari into whatever fantasy world you want to live in, but right now, we do this my way."

"Oh, come on sir-"

"I've threatened it once before and I'm a man of my word. Either you show up on set in an hour or this will be your final role."

Kanan watched as the director walked out of her trailer with his final dramatic line. It was all or nothing. She could either go, ruin her career and risk everything for Mari or stay here and watch her go.

The thought of both ached her heart. However, it was obvious which choice had to be made.

"Quiet on set!"


	3. The End

Mari still wasn't answering any of Kanan's calls.

Kanan laid in bed as she sighed for the umpteenth time. Every sign was pointing to her to just let it go. More girls were out there in the world, she was a star on the rise so girls would die to be even seen near her. However, her heart stayed latched to Mari as if she were her life support. What she had with that blonde-haired beauty was something she had built over years, no other person in the world could understand her as much as she did. Kanan would be damned if she gave that up when Mari was still out there.

Each day went by mindlessly as she just showed up to the stage, said some pretty words, then went home. Everyone's praise fell to deaf ears as she still went back to her trailer each day to the same voicemail tone. Ironic enough, Kanan couldn't even leave a voicemail as Mari never emptied her voicebox. All she could do was hear her pre-recorded voice to keep her going day by day.

It had only been a few weeks since Mari left. Kanan was still stuck in filming, since she was the main character. While everything around her was fine, each second was breaking Kanan more on the inside. Every night ended in tears while every morning became harder to rise out of bed.

Each day Kanan was given false hope in which they would be finished filming but then suddenly something always went wrong, keeping the blue-haired girl trapped longer and longer. She had grown past her furious state as now she simply did not care. Sure she was being paid for the movie but it grew to the point where it wasn't even worth it anymore. After a long night of telling the director how she felt as well as the truth about the day Mari left and why she just had to go to catch her, he simply didn't care. It was the same threats held against her head.

After every scene, Kanan would try and talk to the director once more into letting her go but the conversation always played out the same way.

"Kanan, I'm going to tell you one more time, since you don't seem to get it. You are staying here until this is all over. We can't have a movie without one main star on set and since your little girlfr-"

"Don't call her that."

Kanan hated when he did that. She flinched at the mention of Mari. Even he knew that, but substituting her name just made it all the worse for the young girl. Everyone by now had known not to talk of Mari, at least not around Kanan. The fight still echoed in the halls along with the rumors of what stood between the girls.

"Look, you already know what would happen if you leave, I don't have to remind you. We'll need you for at least another month, then you can run off wherever you want and no one will care."

Despite the anger she had once felt over her constant rejections, only tears built in her eyes. She just wanted to be happy. Nothing hurt more than suffering alone, especially when there was once someone to stand by her side. Kanan understood that now and couldn't help but become more heartbroken as she thought of how Mari used to handle these situations on her own.

This, the feeling of being truly alone, wasn't what she wanted anymore. She'd rather struggle, give up everything she worked so hard for, just to go back to how it used to be. Things wouldn't be the same as time changes people, but at least Kanan could say she tried. Besides, when she struggled, at least a certain blonde haired girl was always by her side.

Just the thought of Mari calmed Kanan. However, with a calm mind, the young diver still knew what was the right choice.

She hated the idea of becoming so self reliant on the blonde girl but at the end of the day she was empty without her. It's why she always went back.

The next thing to happen didn't need anymore thought put into it. Grabbing everything she could, Kanan stuffed her suitcases. Things went flying as the young girl tried to get everything before someone noticed she wasn't on set. Running away wasn't what she wanted to do. A matter of fact, she never wanted to run away; she just wanted to be at ease once more. Even if Mari were to deny her, going to where she was truly at peace would at least make the pain more bearable. Turning her back on the one thing that brought her that serenity wasn't her best choice, but it was time she changed that.

With her bags packed and no more traces of the young girl, Kanan walked to the door of her trailer.

Resting her hand on the frame she looked back one last time. Doing something like this would guarantee she would never be brought back to starlight. In reality, she was walking away from future million dollar projects. She would fade from the light, never to be heard of again. However, neither money nor fame was what she sought after anymore. Maybe it was a sign of growing up or just the reality that in a cold world, losing the one thing that brought you warmth could never be replaced, no matter the price.

Holding her head high, Kanan walked out.

She didn't exactly know where to go but she did have an idea. Besides, the world was her oyster now.

"Come on, Mari! It's just past the trees."

"Kanan, we're gonna get in so much trouble when the teachers find out we skipped class, or worse, when Dia finds out."

Mari followed behind Kanan as the young diver brought her to the small forest behind their school. The school building sat upon a hill, shining brightly at the top and as it went downhill, a small forest mixed between mikans and trees surrounded it. As rural as it sounded, there was no denying the view of it all.

"It's okay, I already told Dia what I was doing and she actually encouraged it!"

Mari looked at Kanan dumb-struck,

"Dia? Our Dia? Mole on her lower lip? Girl who is severely over protective of her sister and would murder us if we tried to feed her candy again while she was away?"

Kanan nervously giggled at Mari's statement,

"Oh yeah, Ruby seemed so happy with that lollipop too… I should sneak her one again. That's not the point! I mean, technically, she didn't approve of us skipping class. However she approved of what I was doing in general."

"And what exactly are you doing, Kanan?"

Mari questioned as she walked through a dirty path. It hadn't seemed to be walked on by many people as it was quite narrow, only fitting one person. She mentally already devised a plan as to how she was going to sneak these stains on her school clothes past her maids.

Kanan never responded to Mari's question however, as she kept looking forward.

The two girls walked in silence feeling a bit awkward. It wasn't often that Kanan just kept quiet. Mari kept herself preoccupied with the scenery however. Sunlight shining through the trees wasn't something she saw often as she was always trapped in her "tower" back home.

While glancing at the life all around her, Mari didn't notice Kanan had stopped. As the blonde bumped into Kanan, she took a step back before realizing they were at an empty area within the forest. The one path led to a small cliff, raised just enough to see the water before them but not enough to where it gave away the location easily. Within the area there was but one fallen over tree, acting as a seat for the sea to be viewed.

Kanan stayed facing the water as Mari checked out the new area,

"Uh, Kanan, where are we exactly?"

Kanan finally turned to look at Mari with a smile across her face,

"It's a hideout."

"A hideout? From what?"

Kanan walked over to the fallen tree, taking a seat on it. She stretched her legs on it before patting the seat next to her.

"Everything."

Mari looked at the girl confused as she came closer.

"What do you mean? There isn't really anything to be hiding from. Except for maybe Dia when we finally head back."

Kanan turned her head, keeping her eyes fixed on the water,

"Mari, I wanna tell you something. A part of me wants to keep this a secret for myself, but if I don't say it, I never will."

Mari looked intensely at Kanan. She hadn't been serious with her since, well just about ever, the thought of what she was going to say was almost frightening. Before she could question further though, Kanan stuttered out her words.

"I…I, uh, I wanna..."

Kanan's eyebrows scrunched up as she couldn't get out the words she was trying to string together.

Turning to face Mari now, Kanan placed one of her hands on Mari's thigh, causing the blonde girl to jump up.

Nothing more happened as Kanan just stared at her with intensity in her eyes, wanting something to happen on its own.

"Um, Kanan?"

The young diver's face broke into a blush but she refused to remove her hand.

"I wanna do something, but I'm scared… I'm scared you won't like me for what I do."

Mari's heart beat rapidly in her chest. She knew what was going to happen, anyone with common sense knew but something in her wanted to play dumb. She couldn't get her hopes up, not when they had been for so long over the young diver.

"And what exactly are you doing, Kanan?"

Mari repeated her question from earlier, now understanding the situation around her.

Kanan just took one last quick glance at her lips before moving forward. It wasn't as soft and gentle as Mari imagined a first kiss to be but the way Kanan fit so perfectly with her, she wouldn't have it any other way.

"Okay passengers, we have officially stopped in Numazu! We hope you enjoy your stay at the beautiful ocean side town and have a great time!"

Kanan jumped up as she heard the announcements over the intercom. She began to wipe the tiredness from her eyes as she smiled back at her daydream. It was a memory of when her and Mari were younger. Even then she couldn't say how she felt, but at least she showed it.

Kanan's heart hadn't stopped racing since she left. She didn't exactly know where Mari was but knowing her, she would be back home. It's where she always went after being away for so long. Kanan couldn't blame her, she always went to what felt right. It was oddly soothing to be back in a small town, especially if it's where each of their best memories laid.

Grabbing her luggage, Kanan began to exit the train. It had taken her nearly 8 hours to get back home considering she hadn't gotten a ticket beforehand and Tokyo was beyond packed to get anywhere quickly.

As she exited the train, she saw the next bunch of people rounding up to go to Tokyo from Numazu, one specifically caught her eye. An energetic little captain bouncing on her feet, dying to get in the cart.

"You?"

You stopped bouncing, looking at the girl. A smile broke out across her face as she dodged the people around her trying to reach her childhood friend,

"Kanan? What are you doing back in Numazu?"

Kanan approached You, slightly struggling to wheel three bags of suitcases,

"Oh, I was just coming back from my last job."

If only You knew how true those words were.

"Oh, Kanan, I don't know how to say this but, you look awful."

You giggled as she saw how tired Kanan looked, the older girl just smirked at her before lightly punching her shoulder. It had been years since the two had really gotten to see one another. The playfulness was still in the air though.

"Hey this is what happens when you get older. It'll happen to you soon enough."

As they both laughed, Kanan couldn't help but feel like a kid in that moment,

"So, You, I see you've grown a bit since I last saw you,"

Kanan said while ruffling You's always messy hair. Really looking at her though, Kanan was a bit surprised at her growth.

"Come to think of it, when was the last time I saw you? Weren't you like, to my shoulders? Now you're my height, it's weird."

You swatted away her hand, attempting to fix her hair,

"I think when you graduated high school, that was the last I had seen of you? Past that you went and chased the starlight. How is that going by the way? I heard you were in this big thing with Mari-"

"Mari! Do you know where she is?"

Kanan was wrapped up in the moment between them; she momentarily forgot why she even came back home.

"Sorry, Kanan. I haven't exactly been around lately either. Being co-captain of my dad's ferry really takes me away from home. I just got back today. Maybe if you ask Dia, she might know. I actually just saw her! She was walking around town with Ruby, Hanamaru, and Yoshiko. Or at least I think that was Yoshiko, either that or someone with a cape was following them. Either way I heard she is staying at Chika's Inn if you can't catch her in town. Say hi to Chika for me would you!"

You attempted to move past Kanan as the older girl looked at You puzzled, she had just talked with Dia last week and she was in Tokyo.

"Dia's home? Wait so if nearly everyone is back, why are you leaving?"

You blushed at the question,

"Uh, I was just gonna meet up with someone."

"You, are you hiding something?"

"NO! I-I mean, no. Nope. It is all good here. Just gotta, go, see... Tokyo."

You stumbled upon her words as she slightly scooted further away from Kanan, placing her hands behind her back. The older girl caught her wrist though before she could hide it, a pink homemade bracelet hung loosely around it.

Young love, it always brought a smile to Kanan's face.

"Hey, don't sweat it, You. I won't tell anyone."

You looked at everywhere but Kanan,

"I literally have no idea what you're talking about but, uh, good luck with Mari. I've heard what's gone on between you two. Just, don't give up, okay? At least you guys had something."

You turned around to finally board the train but not before she could, Kanan grabbed her shoulder,

"You, I know I haven't been around in a long time but, if Riko looks at you like the way she did when you were in school, I think the feeling is mutual."

Kanan didn't want to give You false hope but she did always watch the others closely. Riko's eyes always stayed on You for a bit too long when she'd emerge from the pool after swimming young captain looked back at Kanan, slightly not believing her words though,

"Do you really think so?"

"I know so."

You fully turned, embracing Kanan into a quick hug before pulling back. She had to try something, You's last couple of years getting nowhere past Riko and hers friendship was taking a toll on her, it was time she risked it all.

"Then let's go!"

"Let's!"

You quickly adjusted her bag over her shoulder before running to the quickly closing doors of the train. She saluted back,

"See you later, Kanan! Tell Mari I say hi!"

Kanan giggled as she saw You barely skid into the doors, fully excited for the future. At least with that conversation, she had a lead. Dia.

—-

"Dia, if you love me, you'll tell me where Mari is."

"Kanan, if _you_ love me, you'll unhand me."

What started as a simple question turned into a large chase around town. Kanan barely got to Mari's name before Dia took off, leaving behind the others. As they ran around town, the young diver could occasionally hear Dia yell out things along the lines of, "Leave me out of this," as well as "I'm on vacation," yet Kanan knew she was hiding something. She wouldn't run if she wasn't guilty.

As they continued the chase, Dia had either gotten faster or maybe the lack of exercise was finally catching up to Kanan. In the end though, Kanan took a shortcut and caught Dia, putting her into a chokehold to get her to talk. Usually Dia was easy to persuade, but obviously she proved her wrong with that wild goosechase.

"Come on, I went to her house already and they told me she wasn't there."

Dia struggled to get out of Kanan's grip as the taller girl just kept talking with her, not even phased by her efforts,

"I tried going to my house to see if maybe she was waiting for me but that was a long shot honestly. I figured you'd know or at least say you didn't, but from the way you ran you must know something so spill it. Also you look kind of blue, Dia."

Dia had given up her struggle about halfway through the sentence, hoping Kanan would just put an end to her misery. She had been in this strange third wheel situation for years now. Not even her job had this much drama.

"Why can't you just find her on your own? Use your brain."

Dia choked out as Kanan scoffed at her words,

"Don't you think I've tried?"

Kanan finally released Dia from her grip to use both of her hands as an emphasis towards her sentence. As the shorter girl composed herself on the floor, she sighed in disbelief. She just barely made it to Chika's Inn before she was caught. She almost escaped with no troubles. Getting up from the ground, Dia cleared her throat,

"Kanan, what happened to our last conversation? Did you not even listen to anything you said? Because from the looks of it, you're not moving on."

Kanan scrunched her eyebrows in frustration. Not with Dia, but more of with herself and her inability to just let things be.

"Don't you think I tried it, Dia? I've been trying for so long but she's all I think about. Whether we're together or apart, all I see is her. I know I'm a shitty person for letting her go, but I just want her back. She doesn't have to be with me, but I might finally be able to let her go if I just try for once in my life."

Kanan finished her mini speech on the verge of tears. She hated showing her insecurities, but she had to get it out. She couldn't keep hiding herself when all it did was hurt others in the process. It was going to be a long and awkward road ahead of her, but if it meant she stood a chance at getting Mari, she'd go through it.

Dia sighed, it was just like Kanan to try at the very last minute. While she wanted to lie and forget about it all, Dia couldn't walk away from a love story she had helped patch together over years.

"I'll never forgive you if you hurt her again."

Kanan looked at her with doubt. It wasn't in Dia's nature to hold a promise like that over her head but she wasn't going to say anything if Dia was actually going to help her.

"I won't tell you where she is exactly but I'll give you a hint,"

Taking a moment to think about her hint, Dia thought of the best, yet subtle answer.

"Go back to where it all started."

Finishing her sentence, she turned back into Chika's Inn. As she got to the doors, Kanan called out to her,

"Wait!"

Dia, who was pulling the hanging fabric out of the way, turned around.

"What do you mean? Do you mean where we met? Or where our relationship started?"

Dia simply shrugged her shoulders before saying,

"Follow your heart or tear this town upside down trying to find her."

With Dia entering the Inn, Kanan was left to her questions. Was she implying she was still at home? They did meet when her and Dia called Mari down from her room as kids. Could Mari have just lied to the maids to say she wasn't there? Rather than taking the moment to think about it, Kanan jumped into action.

—

It wasn't easy getting past the guards at the Ohara Hotel. It was even more difficult after finding out they remodeled the entire place. Kanan kept to the dark corners as she moved her way through the halls. Where she remembered rooms to be, were now dead ends or turned into closets. Everything was all over the place.

Kanan tried to recall which floor was Mari's. After growing older, she recalled Mari telling her to visit her sometime. Of course Kanan never did, but Mari still invited her with hopes that she would want to visit. Shaking her head, Kanan wished she could remove regrets like those from her memory. She silently cursed to herself as she thought back on it all. How stupid of herself was it to not take Mari up on those chances. All the more moments they could've spent together, wasted.

Kanan finally stopped in front of a room. It was a large suite, it looked to be the most expensive one there. It took up about half the floor and if Kanan was correct in her direction, it should face the ocean. Just the way Mari liked it.

Kanan went ahead as she placed her hand on the door knob. It was now or never. She had no time to prep as whatever her heart wanted to say, it would have to say it now. Pushing the door open, Kanan walked into the large room.

It looked much more plain than she imagined. Dark walls with business-like feel to it. Stepping in further, Kanan felt like maybe she had walked into the wrong suite. She was proven right with just a simple sentence.

"Who is it?"

Kanan stopped dead in her tracks. That was a man's voice she knew very well. She tried to stay silent in hopes she wasn't heard but he was far too close to the door for Kanan to walk away unnoticed now.

Seeing him enter around the corner, Kanan tensed up,

"H-Hello, Mr. Ohara."

Mari's dad finally came into view, getting a good look at who was at his door. His curiosity turned to disgust far too quickly for Kanan's liking.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

Kanan, who didn't want to be there as much as him, simply took a step back,

"I got lost, that's it. I'll be ok my way now. Sorry to disturb."

Despite being much older, Kanan couldn't help but still fear the man. He had so much power while she had virtually nothing.

"And where were you headed exactly? To my daughter's room?"

Kanan could feel the sweat beads on her forehead as she tried to come up with a sentence.

"No, sir. I mean I was looking for Mari, but not in that kind of way, I just need to talk with her."

"You shouldn't be anywhere near her. Thought the guards were a clear enough sign of that."

"I have been away from her, for a long time."

He took a step forward, closing in the other space between them.

"That's a lie. I know you were in that movie with her. I don't need somebody like you screwing my daughter's life. She has a future."

Kanan couldn't take it anymore. Perhaps it was her finally getting her emotions out or just her adrenaline taking over, but she had enough.

"Stop! I get it, you don't like me. You've made it obvious, but I love Mari. I am going to get us back together, or die trying. You can say anything you want but that's not going to stop me. I am going to keep fighting for her until I have nothing more left in me, whether you like it or not."

Kanan didn't sit around to hear the effects of her sentence as she was already turned around, exiting the room.

As she closed the door behind her, she laid her back against the surface as she took a deep breath. She knew she had about 3 minutes to leave before she got caught. Taking a head start, Kanan began to run. Her heart was racing but she couldn't tell if it was over the situation or from running more today than she had within the last couple of months.

—-

It was the end of the day, Kanan had spent hours looking through each place she and Mari held dear to their hearts, or at least she thought. The young diver knew of one more place to look, but something in her wanted to save it for last. The night had long brought its way into the world. A part of her realized that Mari could have left by now, saving Kanan a bit more time to think. She couldn't get a coherent thought out as she searched through town, but maybe it was best to not overthink it.

Taking the path she hadn't seen in years, Kanan realized the grass had long grown over. This place was special for it's time but now, it was but a lost artifact, waiting for it's next explorer.

Kanan reached her old hiding spot. She had already spotted a figure, but to be sure she kept herself silent. Peeking through the trees, Mari sat on the fallen tree. Kanan smiled as Mari had even brought a blanket to keep her from touching the bark. She stared at the ocean in front of her as the moon shone upon its waves.

Taking one step forward, Kanan felt her heart race as she thought of what she was really doing. She was going to risk everything she had spent so long building for this one girl before her. Yet, nothing in her wanted to back down now.

The moon shined so beautifully that night, outlining Mari's silhouette. With her fair skin catching the rays of the light, Kanan had no regrets left in her as she stepped out.

"Mari."

Saying her first word, Kanan finally let herself be known. Mari turned to hear where the sudden noise came from. No one was supposed to be here as it was far too late into the night. She spotted her though. Mari had that blue hair and purple eyes memorized with ease.

"Kanan? What are you doing here?"

It was a question Kanan wouldn't have known the answer to if she was in this position a month ago but now, facing an angel, Kanan had to say it.

"I'm here for you."

Mari was taken back by the answer,

"I'm sorry, what?"

Mari stood up, almost as if she wanted to get away before Kanan stepped closer,

"Wait, I know everything I did before hurt you. I tore you down, used you over and over just for my own selfish needs, but I realized something."

Mari watched Kanan step closer, she wanted to walk away, like the girl before her always did, but she had longed for this moment, she had to hear those words.

"Mari, I love you."

Kanan didn't expect a huge celebration nor forgiveness with her declaration but she felt as if her burden was finally lifted from her shoulders. It did sting soon afterwards when Mari showed no positive reaction.

"I'm sorry for everything I've done. I'm sorry for how I've treated you and what I put you though. I was only selfish in those moments but, I don't want to be anymore."

"Why? Why now?"

Mari's voice cracked as she said her words. With her fist clenched, she held it tightly to her chest as she raised her voice,

"Right when I'm finally ready to move past this, past us, you want to come in here and say all of these things! I only came back to get some type of closure, yet now you decide it's time to own up to everything. Why?"

Kanan wanted to run. She didn't want to say it. She didn't want to tell Mari about her financial problems nor her own deep rooted hatred for how her life had come out. Yet, reality kept her grounded,

"Mari, do you know why I did this?"

Mari knew what would happen if she asked. Just like always, she'd be fed some pretty words and the same cycle would repeat. She had long grown tired of their dance. It was time she moved to a new routine.

"Honestly? No, and I don't care anymore."

Mari began walking away, while every part of Kanan wanted to drag her back and make her hear her words, she knew it wouldn't ever change her mind. She had to let her go, tonight wasn't the night. Instead she just shouted out to her,

"Just so you know, I'm not going to stop trying, Mari! I'll get us back to the way we once were."

The shadows had long taken over the girl, leaving the blue-haired girl in the dark. Grabbing her chest, it never hurt more to see someone she loved so much just walk away.

So this was her karma.

—

"Kanan, can you please make your paper cranes somewhere else, or like, go throw a coin in a well or something?"

All around Dia's hotel room laid homemade paper cranes. Kanan had left her and Mari's spot after hours of thinking. She had to explain herself fully to Mari and let her know that it was never her intention to hurt her, only then could she say she tried. Just a semi-clear conscience would do Kanan wonders in her current state. Dia, however, had no say in the entire situation as Kanan came to crash in her hotel room at twelve o'clock that night. Kanan had stayed up through the hours making her paper cranes in hopes that the gods would see how much work she was putting into all of this and help her just a tiny bit, just for this once chance.

"You know coin tossing doesn't work. Paper cranes show real dedication to the gods, come on even you know that."

Rolling her eyes, the older Kurosawa continued to read the local newspaper.

"Hey, why aren't you in Tokyo?"

It was a question on the taller girl's head for a while. She was so busy with Mari though, she hadn't thought to question everyone else's appearance back in town.

Dia raised her newspaper before speaking out. Unfortunately, her voice cracked in her answer,

"No reason."

Kanan, who was already in front of her, took the newspaper.

"That's a lie, we can do this the hard way like yesterday or you can tell me the truth."

Dia looked around the room, if she sprinted fast enough she might be able to make it out the door in time to not be caught. However, as she looked back at Kanan, she quickly realized her chances were lowered with how close in front of her she was. Slouching in defeat, Dia let out,

"Fine, I was helping Mari."

Kanan quickly jumped up and down in excitement,

"Tell me everything, I can help with literally anything you need, please, I need this chance."

Dia got up, pushing Kanan away from her,

"While I'd love to not help you and leave you to do things on your own, I can't stand you taking up all of my free alone time. Pretty much, Mari is having a party tomorrow night. Her father arranged it to find her some possible suitors."

Kanan's shoulders dropped. Mari never talked about getting married off to anyone.

"Hold on, suitors? Like husbands?"

Dia rolled her eyes,

"No Kanan, like actual suits, of course like husbands. She only held her dad off for so long because she said she loved someone else. Wonder what happened there."

Kanan looked down at the ground as she sat back down to her cranes. She knew it was the truth but Dia didn't have to be so blunt.

"Okay I get it, I messed up."

Dia crossed her arms, feeling slightly taller as Kanan seemed so small in that moment,

"Yeah, you did. But, I've seen everything you've done to get this moment with Mari, so I'll help this once."

Kanan, who was slightly nervous, didn't believe Dia. She looked up,

"Are you serious?"

Dia broke from her usual serious look as she smiled upon Kanan. She reached her hand out, lifting her from the paper cranes that surrounded her.

"Yeah, not everyone gives up their million dollar paychecks for some random girl. However, it's this one chance. After this, I'm going back to Tokyo to continue my family business and I won't be back for another year possibly. This will be the last thing you'll get my help with for a long time. I want you to make it count."

Kanan tightly held onto Dia's hands. Tears brimmed her eyes as she already began her mental plan to get Mari back into her life.

"Deal!"

—

After hours of preparation, Kanan was ready for the party. At least physically she was. She blended in with the hostesses as it was a masquerade party. Having a casual suit with a mask did wonders and luckily it didn't cost a penny as Dia was able to steal an outfit. She would only hope no one would be missing it. Dia didn't stop helping there, she called over Ruby and somehow You as well to help. With some last minute preparation, they were able to get it fitted to Kanan perfectly. You had returned in the morning of the party to Numazu and while Kanan was surprised to see her back so early, a certain piano player followed quickly behind her to greet Kanan after so many years. With a giddy expression between the two, it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what was going on. Kanan could only hope she had the same fate as their love story did.

But now, her fate was unclear as she entered the Ohara hotel's kitchen. She snuck in through the back and so far no one had kicked her out so maybe luck was on her side. It wasn't until everyone started throwing dish upon dish towards her while shouting table numbers that Kanan realized maybe her plan wasn't very well thought out. She had literally no idea what was happening for the first hour she was there but she knew she had to get to Mari.

As Kanan exited the kitchen for the upteenth time, she looked around the room. It was hard to find Mari when so many people were moving around constantly while covered in colorful masks. Rather than staying doing her job and wasting her time, Kanan decided to break through. She entered the ball room. It was just as bustling. She was handed random drinks left and right to refill but Kanan simply set them on a random table and kept moving. She had better things to attend to.

Kanan could spot her friends all dancing at the ball. While at first she was proud to see how far each of them had come, now she was a tad bit jealous. They all grew up, never holding back at what they truly wanted in life and it showed.

You laughed while spinning Riko in her arms as Chika jumped into their dance, Dia conversed with the local deals men to convince them of trading with her company, Hanamaru brought snacks back to Ruby and Yoshiko's table as they attempted to make room for their fifth serving that night. She knew none of them had the same history as her, yet what she would have given to go back and maybe do it another way. It would be nice to see things from a different perspective.

—

"Diaaaa, help meee."

Dia turned around at the sound of the complaining voice. She was still in the ballroom, talking amongst others while watching others dance as well. Rolling her eyes, she already knew who it was. It was beginning to be the end of the night as many guests were leaving. Dia was going to be heading home soon as well, or at least that was her plan. Kanan, however, pouted before her and even though the mask covered a majority of her face, Dia could already see her puppy eyes.

"Kanan, I literally helped you the entire way here and you can't even do this on your own?"

Kanan, not affected by Dia's harsh tone, simply let her hands fall closed together in a prayer,

"Please! I've searched high and low all over the place. And I've used everything you've given me! But I can't find her."

Dia put down the mask she was holding for her outfit.

"You make me want to punch myself."

"That sounds bad."

Dia let out a sigh. She was supposed to be relaxing and enjoying herself before heading back home, not doing whatever this was.

"Kanan, I really don't know where Mari is. I saw her once during the night but she said she wasn't feeling well. God knows where she is now."

Kanan thought back for a moment. Logically she should be in her room, illogically she would be back at their hidden spot, however one was closer so it was her best shot. Giving Dia a pat on her head, Kanan was off. Dia stood there in annoyance as obviously Kanan hadn't checked everywhere if that simple detail helped her. Dia turned back towards the crowds of people. It was up to Kanan to do the rest.

—

The pounding of her own heartbeat enveloped Kanan's ears. She stood before Mari's door. She knew it was the right one as Dia had prepared her to not get lost this time when they were reviewing her gameplan during Kanan's suit fitting. Of course, now most of her plan was gone but maybe it was best. She had nothing to lose anymore. She had long removed her masquerade mask, discarding it in one of the halls. She wanted to show her true self to Mari. This was her moment. Taking a hand on the door knob, Kanan silently pushed it open.

Still never locked.

"Mari?"

Kanan called out to the empty room. She couldn't hear anything but knowing her, Mari wouldn't lay in bed while a party went on downstairs. Kanan let her feet guide her as she walked over to Mari's bedroom. The door was creaked open. Taking a peek, it was clear to see the room.

At the balcony, Mari stood watching the sea as the nightly breeze swayed her locks away from her face while helping her gown flow in the wind. Kanan slowly let herself in.

"Kanan, I told you to leave me alone."

The blue-haired girl smiled as Mari recognized it was her before she even announced her presence.

"And I told you I wasn't going to stop trying."

Mari turned her head slightly away from the view before her. She tried to look annoyed but there was a slight smile in her eyes when she saw her young diver.

"Why can't you just let me go?"

Mari fully turned around to face Kanan. The wind blew behind her as she leaned against the railing of her balcony. Kanan steadily approached her, afraid if she moved too fast she would disappear.

"I told you, I'm done running, Mari. I'll keep coming back. I've thought about us. The riches and spotlight were fun but at the end of the day, it was just you and I."

Now, as Kanan reached Mari closer, she felt like they were magnets. There was no separating them. With only a few steps between them, Kanan continued,

"And now, it's all I want. I don't care about anything else anymore. I tried so hard to keep everything else afloat but I let you fall. You were the only one who actually cared about me and I let you suffer the most. I don't want this anymore. I just want us again. I know we can't ever be the same, but I'm willing to try and piece us back together in someway, only if you let me."

Kanan finally stopped before Mari. They both stared at one another. Mari could feel her tears welling in her eyes as Kanan had long let hers fall. Taking a step forward, the blue-haired girl slowly wrapped her arms around Mari's hips. In a slight panic, Mari backed her head away as Kanan approached her,

"Kanan, what are you doing?"

Rather than going to where Mari thought she was, Kanan rested her head right besides Mari's. She fully embraced their bodies.

"Is this okay?"

Mari awkwardly stood there for a moment before softly wrapping her arms around Kanan's shoulders. Even she couldn't deny that feeling her against her own skin eased her problems away. Kanan spoke into Mari's neck when she felt the arms around her shoulder,

"I don't want to rush you in any type of way. If you want I can leave right now, but I would love one more chance. Even if it is as your friend."

Breaking their embrace, Kanan stepped back from Mari. Her hands traveled up the other girl as she cupped her face.

"I can't promise I won't mess up again. I'm not perfect, I never was. To this day I don't know what you ever saw in me but I would do anything for you to see me in that light again."

Kanan finally reached down, grabbing Mari's hands. She could feel her ears burning as she hadn't ever said so many embarrassing things in her life.

"Just, please, at least think about it."

Rather than staying for her answer though, Kanan turned around. She headed for the door but as she stopped at the frame, she turned around. She couldn't help but think of how ironic the final words to come to her head were. Though the pain was evident on her face, she smiled as she finally said aloud,

"You know, I'll wait forever for you if I have to."

With that, Kanan was out of Mari's sight. It took but a moment later for Mari to crouch down in tears. She prayed each night to hear those words for so long but why at a time like this?

—

"Diaa-"

"Kanan, stop your words right now. I have one more day here in Numazu. I beg of you to let me relax."

Kanan had been tagging along with Dia all over the place as she didn't have anywhere to go. Well, in reality she could go home but being left alone with her thoughts was the last thing she wanted so now Dia was going to have to put up with her until then. Which led them to the shopping plaza in Numazu's town center.

It had been two days since Kanan had asked for another chance. Two days without an answer. It stung each day but it was Mari's choice afterall.

Dia sat her lunch down as she finally relaxed in the chair within the food court. Kanan, following her like a puppy, sat in front of her with her own food.

"Kanan, not that I'm trying to get rid of you, since you don't even listen, but why haven't you gone home?"

The young diver grabbed a soggy french fry, perfectly depicting her mood,

"I told you already, I don't want to go home. I'll just be a depressed potato."

As if she wasn't already one. Dia just rolled her eyes,

"What about when I leave?"

Kanan sat back in her chair, already having a plan,

"Simple, I'll go bother Chika or maybe You. Probably Chika though since You has a girlfriend now. Can you believe she's dating Riko? You know I practically set them up. Hey, maybe I should hang out with her too!"

Dia could already feel mercy for their poor souls.

"You know, if you told Mari to give you another chance, don't you think she would go back to your place to tell you her answer?"

Dia asked as she took a sip from her cup. Kanan felt her pulse spike. She hadn't even told her

Grandpa she had returned nor where she was staying. Mari wouldn't have any clue where she was since she was either with Dia or wandering around town, getting her mind clear.

Pushing herself away from the table, Kanan began running home. Dia stayed sipping from her drink as she watched Kanan leave. It was her final day to relax and she was not about to nag the blue-haired girl on leaving the table a mess. Plus she wanted at least an hour to herself without someone interrupting her. Or, that was the plan, until a certain orange-haired girl happily made her presence known.

"Hey, Dia! Fancy seeing you here."

"God damnit."

—

Kanan was impatiently tapping her foot as her boat that brought her to the mainland was taking her back home. As she looked in the distance, Kanan saw the one she had longed for. Mari was just at the borderline of Kanan's diving shop. She sat in the chairs under the umbrella on her patio. She wore a white sundress with her matching hat to top it off. She was staring at the road, as if waiting for something to appear.

The boat brought Kanan closer and closer. Before she knew it though, she had become too excited. The young diver screamed out,

"Mari! Hey, Mari!"

She waved her hands around as she called to her. Hearing her voice, Mari got up from her seat. She spotted just the person she was looking for. Mari ran past the patio running towards the end of the dock.

Before the boat could park, Kanan jumped off the boat, slightly off balance as she landed on the wood beneath her feet.

They ran towards one another with the wind pushing behind them. Within a couple feet of one another though, they slowed down. Neither were really sure what to do. Standing in front of each other, they let out an awkward laugh. Mari was the first to speak,

"I've been waiting for you, you know."

She looked at the ground as Kanan's eyes followed in embarrassment,

"I'm sorry. I have been staying with Dia. She's been helping me clear my head."

Mari nodded. The conversation died there, slightly awkward as the ocean waves were the only noise either heard. Kanan attempted to start it once more,

"So, I don't suppose you'd want to maybe grab a bite to eat?"

Mari being glad that Kanan was trying simply smiled,

"I'd love that."

—-

What started as a lunch date ended in Kanan and Mari back where it all started. Of course they had run through town, going into numerous stores while acting like kids again. They had stopped by to hang out with Dia for a bit before she excused herself to, "Actually relax for once", as she put it.

Within the hidden forest trail, neither were talking, however it was nice to enjoy each other's presence. Kanan wanted so badly to ask what Mari decided the entire day but she didn't want to ruin anything. Whatever pace Mari set, she would be fine with. Even if the pace never became more than friends. As long as she was back in her life, it was all she could ask for.

Mari finally broke their silence though,

"Kanan, why did you leave? You know what the director said would happen if you did."

Kanan had momentarily forgotten all about her previous troubles in life. She knew it was all said and done so she simply didn't care anymore. Shrugging, she replied,

"It wasn't where I saw myself anymore."

Mari furrowed her eyebrows as she turned to Kanan. She let out in an exasperated tone,

"But, you won't be able to get a decent gig again. We were supposed to be on top. Together."

Kanan pulled herself up from her relaxed pose.

"Mari, none of that matters to me anymore. It used to, for the longest time actually. I know what I gave up right when I left. I wasn't born into a rich family, and while I got a taste of it, I'll probably stay like this for as long as I live. However,"

Kanan placed her hand over Mari's that laid beside her,

"I saw what that did to me. To finally have it all. I turned into someone I didn't even recognize. I hurt a lot of people. I'd rather give it all up than to ever do that again."

Mari looked down at their hands. Neither of them dared to move. The blonde wasn't completely aware of Kanan's financial situation. She knew Dia had money as their family was very wealthy yet Kanan was so free spirited like her, she never gave off the vibe of someone who struggled. Perhaps it was something she just never worried about since money was always in her life. It was strange to see what others would do for it.

"What will you do now then?"

Kanan looked down. In a gentle voice she let out,

"I don't really know, but I'll figure it out."

Mari quickly grabbed Kanan's face with no warning. As their eyes met, a flash a determination went across her face,

"Kanan, I want this. I want us again."

Kanan stood up straight as she was caught off guard with the sudden change in topic.

"A-Are you sure? You don't have to feel bad for my sob story, I'm okay with waiting."

Mari kept her hands on Kanan's face, wanting her to listen to her words.

"No, I don't want either of us to wait any longer. I still want us to take it slow. But no more secret pining or wondering what the other is thinking. This is the most obvious either of us have ever been with ourselves and I don't want this to slip away."

Mari finally placed her hands down, finding Kanan's to interlock their fingers. She lowered her voice in sorrow,

"If I'm being honest, I waited for you at your shop to tell you I didn't want to be together anymore. Before you left on the night of the party, you told me to look back at what I used to see in you, and I did. I didn't see myself with the old you anymore, not after everything you did. Maybe I was holding onto the idea of us more than looking at the reality of our situation. But,"

Kanan felt a light twinge in her heart with Mari's words but she continued holding on to hear her out,

"You're not who you used to be. The old Kanan I fell for wouldn't give up the limelight for me. She wouldn't have kept trying and trying. You're a new Kanan that I can honestly say I love."

As Mari finished her speech, Kanan looked at her with no words. She hadn't thought she had grown very much, in fact she probably made more dumb decisions within the past few days than she ever had within the course of her entire life, yet if Mari said it was her growing then she would do it all again.

Mari gently creeped closer to Kanan. Her eyes darted from her lips back to her purple eyes. Everything in Kanan wanted to go for it, to feel Mari once more against her skin but something was bringing doubt in her.

"I don't want to ruin this."

Kanan whispered out. Mari smiled,

"You won't. I'll make sure of it."

While they had kissed many times in their life, their hearts felt like it was their first time all over again. Faces painted in blushes while heart beats skyrocketed. As they separated, they both felt like children again as their giggles escaped them.

Kanan gently placed her hand on Mari's cheek and in her ever so gentle voice, she whispered to her,

"Thank you for waiting for me."

Grasping her hand, Mari whispered back in a smile,

"Anytime."

With nothing left to say between the two girls, Kanan could help but smile as Mari brought her in for another kiss. Their teeth clashed with Mari's excitement in bringing her forward again but they held onto one another laughing. It was finally their new beginning they had longed for day and night.

There was no more hiding their heart's true message nor running away, but most importantly, no more secrets.

A/N: Can you believe this one-shot turned into a three-part story? Wild. I don't ever want to do this without a plan ever again. Also, yes it has been six months but life is busy and YouRiko makes me soft while taking up all my time so like yeah that's my excuse lmao. Anyways, thanks for reading (๑◡╹)ゞ


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